Get moving

Don't you hate it when your feet fall asleep?  You sat in a position for too long or maybe got lost in some toilet reading and you go to get up . . . oh not again . . . that uncomfortable feeling of pins and needles.  You might stomp your foot, shake your leg, or just tread gingerly until it passes and full sensation is restored.  I think the worst part of this feeling is knowing it is often preventable.  "If only I moved sooner."  "How did I not feel this happening?"

This is far too often the case with me spiritually.  I get complacent.  I get lost in nonsense and when I want to get back on track, my first few steps are painful.  I become frustrated with myself for paying too much attention to things that don't matter and losing sight of what matters to the Lord.  Spiritually I finally tuned into God and I moved.

The other thing when hands or feet "fall asleep" is that those sensations are actually healthy normal responses that tell us our nervous and cardiovascular systems are functioning properly.  If they didn't work in this manner, no uncomfortable sensation would follow (as in the case with prolonged diabetes or when someone has a spinal cord injury).  The results are pressure sores, tissue damage, and in the worst cases, amputation.

I try to keep this in mind with regard to my spiritual walk.   The discomfort that moves me (maybe when I haven't been moved in a while) is normal and healthy and evidence that my soul is still intact.  It is actually a good thing even though it doesn't feel like it at the time.  I might take a few stumbling steps to get back on track but it is worth it.  Although I pray that I don't become complacent in the first place, I am thankful for the reminder (even when it is painful) to get moving.

The Magic Bucket

Without fail every time we get in the car, Zion has to bring a toy or two to keep himself entertained while we drive somewhere.  The other day he brought a trick-or-treat bucket (thank you McDonald's Happy Meal) filled with a few treasures; a gun, his wallet and a Matchbox car.  So we are in the car, he has his bucket on his lap, and he loses control of the bucket but catches it just in time.  The bucket tips over but nothing falls out.  He says (and I quote), "I guess this IS a magic bucket."  I chuckled at his simple explanation for what just occurred.

A few minutes later, the same thing happens . . . he starts to drop the bucket but this time, he's a little too late with his reflexes and the contents of the bucket fall on the floor.  He quickly responds by saying, "I guess it's not a magic bucket after all."  I found this response even more humorous and couldn't help but LOL, literally.  When the result wasn't as cool and the outcome not as desirable, the bucket lost it's magic.  I am not one to turn every little encounter with my children into a profound spiritual analogy but as I have thought about this (and even tried to put it into a simple facebook status), I can't help but see a striking connection to what happens in our own lives.

When God blesses us with something unexpected or undeserved, we call it a miracle . . . something that can't be explained . . . maybe to the unbeliever, magic.  However when our life falls out on the floor, or the consequences of our actions become apparent, or we encounter an obstacle, God often becomes less awesome. He loses his "magic."  But just as the bucket was the same bucket regardless of what happened to the prized possessions on the inside, God is still God and still good and still sovereign and still gracious regardless of whether or not a "miracle" is present.

Do you ever wonder if the disciples felt this way?  When Jesus walked on water, I bet they thought that was awesome, amazing, unreal.  But what did they think the next day or the next week when they were hanging out at sea and Jesus jumped in the water and swam with the rest of them?  Were they disappointed?  Did they still believe He was the Savior?  Did it challenge their faith in Him?  I can't say for sure but they were human, just like you and me, and maybe silently they hoped to see Him do it again.

My prayer is that regardless of my circumstances (or how full my bucket is), that my faith remain steadfast, solid, and maybe more importantly, growing deeper.  I pray that I praise God in the times He saves me and my bucket.   Moreso, I hope that I am open to the ways that God wants to challenge me in order to refine me when I need it most.

I am no blogger

I am not sure what has possessed me to attempt blogging.  I can remember learning about this phenomenon years ago and thinking "nothing I have to say is really that important for anyone to take the time to read it."  I can't say that I have gained any great wisdom that makes that less true today.  However, I would like to think that the Lord has taught me a few things through being a wife, a mother, a daughter, a neighbor, a sister, a friend, a colleague, an aunt, and all the other roles I have acquired.  Hence the title, "The Heart of a Sparrow."  Growing up, I can remember hearing the song "His Eye is on the Sparrow" and reading the verse in Matthew 10 that says, "Are not two sparrows sold for a penny? Yet not one of them will fall to the ground apart from your Father. And even the hairs of your head are all counted. So do not be afraid; you are of more value than many sparrows."  It is a humble reminder that God sees me, He knows me, He teaches me, and maybe, He will use me . . . not despite of my weaknesses, fears, and failures but through them and because of them.  Surely if He thinks about the sparrows, He has something intentional planned for me . . . and for you.


So this is hopefully the start of a documentary.  I'm not sure what direction this blog will go but that is true with life.  I can't promise there won't be a recipe, a craft, or a useless video mixed in but my real intention is to bring something to your life a bit more meaningful and insightful.